Tip of the Day #22: Wedding Traditions that Need to be Retired
It’s Friday, you know what that means! Today I am focused on wedding traditions that need to be retired. I love many wedding traditions that have been passed down over the years but there are a few traditions that are completely played out. Time for a wedding tune up!
Wedding Dress Hand-Me Downs
I love the idea of passing a wedding dress down thru generations but the thought of wearing an 80’s style wedding gown with puffy sleeves in its original form makes me shudder. If your mother, grandmother or aunt wants to pass down a dress for you to wear for your big day, ask if you can incorporate pieces of the dress into an updated, modern version. If there are beautiful lace accents or the dress has intricate beading throughout the bodice, choose pieces of the dress you love and update into a more modern shape and style. Make sure you infuse a sense of your style into the dress and overall look. If the original bride is uncomfortable with you making alterations to the dress, pass. You should not wear a dress to appease someone else and sacrifice your personal style.
Wedding Flash Mobs
Okay, I admit, the wedding flash mob on the hit series “The Office” was a cute idea but it has been so played out over the past year. Instead of playing drill sergeant and forcing your bridal party to attend dance practices leading up to the wedding, put together a video montage or music video to show at your wedding. Keep it short (under five minutes), silly and lighthearted. Film pieces of the video in the months leading up to the wedding and hire a local film student to edit and produce the video. Make up a rap about you and your friends, film your bridal party hanging out in their natural “habitats” or have them leave silly messages revealing stories and anecdotes about you as a couple.
Cheesy Bridal Shower Games
It may initially sound fun to wrap your friends in toilet paper but most bridal shower games are totally played out. Instead of hosting a traditional shower, up the ante! Modern brides are having destination showers to get a few extra days of girl time at the beach or in the countryside. Instead of playing traditional games, hire a chef, florist, yoga instructor or other specialist to come teach a tutorial to your guests. The primary goal of hosting a successful shower is to incorporate all shower attendees and make them feel comfortable with the group. Pick an activity that everyone can enjoy and participate in.
Debauchery Filled Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties
Don’t get me wrong — I love weekends filled with debauchery. I do, however, feel that wedding celebrations should be kept more wholesome. I love seeing brides who steer clear of the traditional bar night filled with sugary shots and slimy strippers. Instead of hitting the bar, take your best gals out to a vineyard for a day of wine tasting, treat your favorite ladies to a luxurious, relaxing spa day or hire a clairvoyant to do tarot card readings for the group at your home. One of my best friends is hosting a joint bachelor/bachelorette party this spring and has planned a silly scavenger hunt and various other fun activities for the whole group. I am so excited that the bride and groom have incorporated all of their friends into a fun-filled weekend to make memories together.
To Hell with Traditional Etiquette
There is a caveat here — I’m a stickler for wedding etiquette in terms of proper behavior at a wedding but I get frustrated when a bride approaches me about wedding drama and worrying about doing what’s “right.” Remember ladies, this is YOUR wedding — call it a bridezilla moment but you should do whatever makes you happy throughout the planning process and your wedding day. Your sister’s best friend asks if she can sing at your wedding? Do-re-mi-NO! Your second cousin twice removed asks if they can bring their four kids to your black tie reception? Hire a babysitter! Don’t give in to other people’s requests — it’s your special day and you should not worry about accommodating other people’s requests.